Brita Thompson presents The Scrappy Crafty Scavenger for economical and broke college craftsters.
1. Ramen Noodle Picture Frame — This is the perfect dorm craft activity considering the proclivity for ramen noodles on college campuses. All you need for this activity is a pack of broken ramen noodles, a small wooden picture frame a paintbrush and some glue. Use the paintbrush to coat the picture frame and artfully arrange the broken noodles on top. Paint a layer of glue on top of the noodles to create an interesting surface. While the glue is still wet, you can sprinkle glitter over your creation. Or spray paint them – gold or silver spray paint adds luxury to even the smelliest and most hideously decorated dorm room. When the frame is finished, you can put a picture of yourself inside and send it to your parents la kindergarten craft or put a picture of your favorite pop culture hottie inside, as I have done with our new president.
2. Toilet Paper MachŽ –According to Father Privett’s abacus, there are roughly 10,000 (okay, more like 2,000) students living on-campus at USF. That means (roughly) 10,000 bottoms that need wiping sometimes several times a day with USF toilet paper. Boys use less toilet paper than girls do. What this means for the scrappy crafty scavenger is that the discrepancy between boys and girls toilet paper use creates a surplus of toilet paper in the dorms, perfect for making papier m‰chŽ creations from the most delicate of all papers! Wire makes a good base for your sculpture, find wire clothes hangers which people hate to have around anyways. I recommend buying a large tub of Mod Podge instead of making the traditional glue. For a sturdier creation, use this newspaper you’re reading instead of toilet paper. Allow time for it to dry. If you want to create a pi–ata, do not use wire, but instead craft a base from cardboard (using staples or masking tape to keep it together). Get creative! For your social justice-oriented friend, make a pi–ata in the shape of the republic of Uganda and fill it with fliers for Amnesty International. For your hip friends make a pi–ata in the shape of Thom Yourke from Radiohead and fill it with Pabst Blue Ribbon. For more color, use strips of magazines!
3. Cafeteria Cup Imaginoculars – Okay, so they won’t magnify anything, but from one side of Phelan, provided you aren’t nearsighted, clearly visible are the windows and not-so private lives of our unfortunate university neighbors. But why limit your spy-scope to what’s actually there, when within the range of your imagination you’re able to spy on anyone you want! Cut the bottoms out of two cafeteria coffee cups and tape them together. Now you’ve got yourself some imaginoculars! Place these paper spectacles to your face and you’ll be able to see Gavin Newsom retroactivating Proposition 8, Father Privett lowering USF tuition, and your eccentric mathematics professor changing into white sneakers for the walk up Lone Mountain. All in the privacy of your own mind!